"Coming Home" 'Verse Master Post
http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1933009.html#cutid1 Coming Home

Coming Out

Good Enough After All Master Post
http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1677665.html#cutid1  Chapter One

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1679432.html#cutid1  Chapter Two

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1680977.html#cutid1 Chapter Three

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1682008.html#cutid1  Chapter Four

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1684626.html#cutid1  Chapter Five

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1685696.html#cutid1  Chapter Six

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1693342.html#cutid1  Chapter Seven

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1698532.html#cutid1  Chapter Eight

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1701734.html#cutid1  Chapter Nine

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1705901.html#cutid1  Chapter Ten

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1712682.html#cutid1 Chapter Eleven

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1713524.html#cutid1  Chapter Twelve

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1737537.html#cutid1  Chapter Thirteen

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1776473.html#cutid1 Chapter Fourteen

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1793220.html#cutid1 Epilogue

How It Always Should Have Been Master Post

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1818196.html#cutid1  Chapter One

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1821541.html#cutid1  Chapter Two

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1828986.html#cutid1  Chapter Three

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1846414.html#cutid1  Chapter Four

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1876987.html#cutid1 Chapter Five, Part One

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1882067.html#cutid1 Chapter Five, Part Two

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1910071.html#cutid1 Chapter Six

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1926238.html#cutid1 Chapter Seven

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1931783.html#cutid1 Chapter Eight

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1971329.html#cutid1 Chapter Nine, Part One

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/1979620.html#cutid1 Chapter Nine, Part Two

http://community.livejournal.com/kradam_ai/2017083.html#cutid1  Chapter Nine, Part Three

Just me right now
WOw, I cannot believe I am actually using my LJ as a JOURNAL. But I am not a fic writer so nobody reads this anyway. It's just for me I guess. I am in the midst of a soul crushing depression. I numb it out with alcohol, or I sleep as much as I can and dream troubled dreams. I dreamed today that my mother told me she should have killed me instead of raising me. I wonder if that's really how she feels? Nobody has ever loved me, and the lonliness is almost unbearable. I need an escape, and fast. I am not a suicidal type; that's such a cowardly way out. I like to think that even those of us that are fucked up, or were mistakes...are here for a reason. AT least I hope I'm right. I am only 28...if I am not right, I have a long, miserable life ahead.

Bipolar Disorder!
So I was diagnosed with Type 1 Rapid Cycle Bipolar Disorder about 8 years ago. Since then I have been on a whole host of medications, and I am now writing a bipolar memoir. Started a new medication called lamictal a few weeks ago, and now I am all broken out in hives. Side effect of the medication. I am using benadryl and hydrocortizone to get rid of them. That's the worst part, the side effects. Jaw tightness and sweating from the Geodon(an antipsychotic) and zombie like sleep walking from Ambien(a sleep aid that also counteracts mania) and now hives from Lamictal(a mood stabilizer). Ugh. Anyway, this will probably become something of a bipolar journal until all of this is under control, so those of you reading this, bear with me please!

bleh i don't understand anything anymore!
So I came here to join a family of other Kradam fans, as that is hard to find online. I am a proud Glambert for life, but I am totally in love with adorable Kris too. So I come to live journal as the members seem to love both. However, I get flack for not knowing the atmosphere after being a member of this board for a whole 36 hours. Whatever, I may or may not go back, but will certainly not be intimidated by people that shun other fans for having a different POV. EXCUSE ME FOR BEING A KRADAMITE AND WANTING TO COMMUNICATE WITH OTHERS LIKE MYSELF.


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